Atay, Ramadan and arranged marriage

When I open the window each day to let in the fresh morning air, the smell of mint always wafts in. Mint tea or atay is the staple drink of Moroccans, from my 8 month old host brother to grandparents. It is present at nearly all social gatherings, even in travel kit sizes for mobility. Not much of a tea aficionado at home, I've become a heavy atay drinker and it will certainly be one of the aspects I will miss the most when I leave.

As Ramadan quickly approaches, there's a noticeable change taking place in the city. Stores are beginning to close earlier, the time changed back one hour, and ftoor (breaking of the fast) food is starting to appear. It's interesting to watch the whole city, including the people at my placement, prepare for Ramadan physically, mentally and spiritually. There is an air of anticipation as some begin cleansing their bodies and minds, while others frantically exhale their goodbyes to daytime cigarettes.

Going over my notes from our trip south, the girls explained to my co-intern and I why they thought arranged marriage was the most effective method against conflict. From a western perspective, the mention of arranged marriage seems somewhat preposterous to me. However, after talking to them I was able to gain a much different perspective on situations where arranged marriage can actually be beneficial.

When a boy gets married, he brings his wife to live in his childhood home, where his parents are still living. The household is soon filled with each son bringing his wife home, as well as the children that start to come. Things can get tense pretty easily as young cousins start fighting, then mothers get involved. If the mother-in-law did not pick the wife for her son, she is an easy target as a scapegoat. The mother-in-law has supreme power and influence in the household, and the best way to avoid conflict is to remain in her good graces. So in the name of family peace, most girls seek out arranged marriage. It is an interesting perspective where arranged marriage has potential, but can also fall apart or lead to a miserable life for women, but for the most part it is an accepted way of life.

My placement is an organization aimed at empowering Amazigh (Berber) women, and educating them of their rights so that they can participate in their community as equals to men and non-Amazigh Moroccans. Because of the severe marginalization (mostly due to the language barrier) most Amazigh women are not active members of Moroccan society and are stuck living in below standard conditions with limited access to resources. I've learned a great deal by research but mostly, from talking to people and listening to their personal stories and observations. I've noticed I am starting to understand a lot more Moroccan Arabic than I did when I first got here as well as French, and people sometimes know a little bit of English. I look forward to continue meeting people and keep hearing and recording their stories to integrate them into my capstone project.